Flutters ... Again...

Obsession - So... the flutters have started again... *sigh*

I was getting good about keeping my cool and even feeling like there was nothing inappropriate about wanting to get to know my Obsession better. Then yesterday, flutters... Again. Daydreaming... Again...

A couple things... He's starting to remember things we talk about. Like he said he drove by my apartment and after he passed by realized he couldn't remember which one I said was mine. So now he knows. The fact that he remembered enough to actually pay attention and sadly that he thought of me outside of work made me happier than it should have. In fact, Monday I remember walking out in my pjs and suddenly felt self conscious that he might have seen me makes me wonder if it was the exact same moment he was driving by! He said he noticed the management companies sign. So now he knows and will be looking... *sigh* I started daydreaming about him stopping by. Starting to work out with the Husband Creature. So innocent daydreaming but still daydreaming.

And then Wednesday we had interviews for my replacement and I felt really good about this set. Like, something inside knows that this is the group. The other two sets of interviews I didn't feel it like I do now. So I'm convinced God is prepping me. They will find my replacement and I will be moving to my local office. No longer available to chat daily with Obsession, and it makes me sad! But I will see him here and there... Just not as much. And it's probably a good thing. But it has caused some daydreaming. Like potential coffee dates, running into him at the local office and wondering how he'd act towards me, etc.

I keep having to go to his office to chat. So it makes me feel silly, like I'm forcing myself on him. But when we start chatting, it's obvious that I'm not an annoyance. He seems to keep the conversation going, he's very engaging... And time passes like nothing.

I did something silly yesterday, now I regret it. I left a note on his car saying "Have a great weekend :)". Once I drove away I worried I crossed a line but it was too late to change it. I have thought about doing it before but felt silly and never did it. I should have kept that thought process. I didn't get a chance to say bye because I was talking to a coworker on my way out. And because I'm obsessive I felt weird about it, I did something I now regret.

He mentioned something about a girl in the local office and told me to try something and mention his name. So this morning when I came into the local office, I did what he said, and sure enough what he said would happen, did. So I told her "Obsession" said you'd say that. We laughed. I told her she should call and tell him. Sure enough she did, they had a good laugh. I tried not to eavesdrop. But after her conversation she came to talk to me about it. He mentioned that I make the best chocolate chip cookies and told her to tell me to make her some. lol Again... love the fact that he thought about me enough to bring me up to her at all.

ACK! I am such a stalker! I just found out there's a list of every employees address and what do you think I did?! Googled Obsessions address! I'm such a stalker! But he is WAY out there. No wonder I never run into him around town! Though he passes my place for his kids soccer practice, there's no other reason for him to be out this way. *sigh* Guess I can relax any time I'm out and about. lol

HunkofBabe - I haven't talked about him much. But he deleted me off Facebook forever ago and finally go the guts to request him back. He added me and then a week or so later deleted me. At first it really bothered me but then I just figured, oh well...

Colorado - Well apparently he isn't ghosting, but he doesn't seem to care to communicate right now. He seems fine with his divorce and is enjoying time out in the wilderness away from technology. So I've decided to just let him be... I'm sad we don't chat as much. But I think he goes through phases of needing to prove he doesn't need anyone. I told him I missed our chats and he didn't seem to acknowledge it.