Men...

It's that time again. Another post about the confusing men in my life. This sounds horrible but Computer Geek is getting laid and I'm jealous! Though I'm not into the kinky stuff he's into it still sucks just knowing he's out there getting laid and I haven't had sex or any form of physical affection in ages! heh Computer Geek and I have come to an understanding of what type of relationship we have. We both enjoy flirting but know it would never go any further. It's been A LOT of fun. I was concerned when he told me his "friend" was coming out to stay with him for a month. I thought it might change the way he treats me since I'm pretty sure this is his future girlfriend. I'm happy to say that is not the case!

Geek Photographer - Well I was right in thinking my feelings would change. He pushed me to a point that I thought about dropping him altogether. I read how I felt about him and I miss those feelings. I lost the ability to feel safe to be myself with him. He started teasing me... A LOT! Since I started to care about him, it impacted me more then it probably should have. I became angry and frustrated, which then in turn stopped me from being myself. For a good week or two I really just wanted to drop him but still couldn't walk away from the friendship. Finally I broke down and confronted him in an email. His response was short and didn't really have any bearing on how I felt but I think just getting it off my chest really helped aleviate the need to make sure he was ok with me. Since then things are back to normal. I finally got my head out of my ass and decided that if he didn't like me for who I am he wasn't worth having in my life. Oddly I know he likes me (friend or otherwise) and the teasing is his way of "chasing the girls around the playground" as Computer Geek puts it. And it makes a lot of sense.

Burbank - I broke down and called him a couple weekends ago and we had an absolutely fantastic conversation! And the following week he called me just to say hello! So things are good. I know he's stressed about his lack of job and it makes him a pretty depressing person to talk with. But when I called him he was surprisingly honest about where he's at emotionally. And it helped me have more grace for his situation.

Older Guy - Offered to let me stay at his place while he was back East visiting his family and then accidentally locked me out of the house. It was quite entertaining. But he felt horrible. He cleaned out the spare room for me and everything. He wants me to help him with his new business venture. I've told him I'd be glad to help out on the weekends I'm free. He's turning out to be a good friend. I no longer have the physical attraction I did early on in our friendship. And it's been a good year since we've been friends. It's kind of cool.

Washington - He and I had a bit of a unique text conversation a little over a week ago. We've always done the sexual inuendos but this was full on sex texting. I feel a bit awkward about it now only because it's obvious this wasn't the first time he thought about doing stuff with me. hehe I should have known. It's opened a new avenue to our relationship. I know we're both curious about what it's going to be like to meet up in person, especially after this.

Well I'm off